Slacking...

I have kind of been slacking on my vitamins. (And have missed occasionally my bp meds...whoops! But hasn't affected it much so that is good). I make sure I take 1 of my fish oils (mostly because it has vitamin D in it and I definitely need it because of winter coming), my baby aspirin, my multi (out of prenatals need to pick them up), and a couple of the folic acid.

I napped today. Was so sleepy, we had 6 hrs of sleep. But it definitely wasn't enough. I don't count this as a symptom anymore simply because I think the increased progesterone makes me more sleepy in general. Pregnancy or no pregnancy.

I watched baby story again today. This woman had 2 miscarriages before she got pregnant with her second baby. What is with the baby stories being about couples who have struggled? It makes me that more emotional when watching, and that much more hopeful.

James said something to me that made me not know it I wanted to laugh or cry. He was watching the show with me and I commented on how amazing the umbilical cord is. He looked at me disgusted and said, "Jessica, I am eating. And you are making me watch a baby get yanked out of a woman's belly" (it was a csection..). I again said, "So? It is amazing!" (I was eating too and it didn't bother me...). And then he said it. The comment that I laughed at, but it really hit me. "Jess, its not like I am going to sit there eating M&Ms while you give birth. If you ever get to experience it...." I laughed because of the M&Ms and joked saying, "Don't worry I won't either. They don't let laboring women eat."

But inside I was saying, Oh God please let me experience a healthy pregnancy soon. Even James is questioning so deeply now. Let it be our turn soon. The reality of my husbands words, the raw emotion behind it...it hurt. We are hurting God. We are asking for one blessing...a miracle of life. Please don't ignore our cries.

I will update later today on my progesterone level. But for now I need to get to the lab before it closes.